Tag Archives: Jokes

Philosophy joke.

Philosophy is pointless.”

Jordan Peterson: “Hold my beer.”


Randy Newman – You’ve Got A Friend in Me Remixes

Local Man Not Dissuaded By Vomit – The Garlic Journal

BENTONVILLE, AR – Yesterday, at 12:01 PM, 27-year-old Brad Stephenson told reporters that he still planned on ordering a sundae later that evening as he was seen vomiting outside the local McDonald’s. A television crew from station WEFT reported that they approached the young man after seeing him knelt over the railing in front of the eatery, expunging what they described to be “pea soup-like.” Upon asking Mr. Stephenson if he indeed had eaten any pea soup, the young man only managed to gasp “McChicken” before vomiting again. Moms and children, upon first arriving at the scene, only ran inside of the building, seemingly unaware at what had made Mr. Stephenson sick in the first place. Mr. Stephenson reached out his hand to express his concern for the children, but had to quickly retreat his hand to his stomach, where he felt another ball of puke gurgling. “I can feel another ball of puke gurgling,” he told WEFT. When asked if he had planned on ever returning back to the establishment, Mr. Stephenson responded “Of course. Sundaes are still only a dollar, aren’t they?” When pressed further for comment, Mr. Stephenson implied that he was never going to learn to cook his own food. “They don’t sell frozen McChickens at the supermarket that you can microwave, do they?”

“The Garlic Journal” Announcement

Now is as good of a time as any to announce “The Garlic Journal”: a parody of “The Onion” that reads more like a personal opinion piece. Basically, I intend “The Garlic Journal” to be joke articles where I take extreme positions that I don’t honestly believe for comedic effect (or for satire). “The Garlic Journal” is intended to enrage and get people laughing (or, more importantly, thinking, if they are actually capable of it (which I am not anticipating to be the case most of the time. At least I’ll get a good laugh out of it all)). Basically, a more extreme version of what I already do.

I already pretend to be a monster on Youtube. I plan on continuing this, and trying to work on getting better with video (but it will be a slow process). The writing will be similar to that. I plan on writing joke articles in defense of pedophilia, racism, and political assassination, to name a few subjects. I hope that my human right of free speech will be protected. It is quite scary. The more oppressive the United States government becomes, the more terrifying it, obviously, is. And, based upon the way the current political climate feels among the citizenry, this trend is going to continue. Political correctness and statism are leading America straight towards totalitarianism, and it remains to be seen if the diligent minority will be enough to keep the Republic from collapsing completely. But, nonetheless, I am going to write joke articles. I’m going to express my natural human right of free expression. I hope that people will support my right, even if they hate my sense of humor.

And, for the love of God, I hope that no one finds out where I live, and that some maniac decides to try to kill me, as I know will be the case someday. I fully expect to end up like Larry Flint; or, at the very least, Martin Luther King Jr. Is it worth it? All I can say is that I feel incomplete without it. There’s a part of me that deeply wants to do this, in spite of the risks involved. There’s something about expressing your rights freely in the face of dangerous threat. It’s perhaps the most exhilarating feeling there is.

“I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.” – Evelyn Beatrice Hall.

We mustn’t let the evil people win.

“Give me liberty, or give me death!” – Patrick Henry, March 23rd, 1775.

Offend the Fuck Out of People.

Truth in advertising.

I’m tired of deceitful advertising in the world, so I’m going to prove my ethical superiority by marketing myself as a crazy person.

I like this.

Nothing gets in the way of a dream like lack of skill and technical know-how, and figuring out how much time and effort you really want to put into practicing whatever the fuck it is.




Videos that can only be categorized as “Comedy”.


This is a helluva joke.

*God, holding a meeting with the angels*

God: “Alright, I’m going to create something called ‘humans’. They’re going to be physically attracted to each other, and they’re going to do something called ‘fucking’ a lot. Basically, it just feels good.”

Angels: “Alright! Hell yeah!”

God: “And as long as they don’t eat anything from this tree that I’ve put in this garden for some reason, they won’t have to feel any confusing emotions regarding this physical attraction. They can fuck and fuck all they want, and they’ll never feel any negative or confusing emotions.”

Angel: “But what if they DO eat from the tree?”

God: “Well…then I guess they’re fucked.”

*angels laugh*

…I’m a fucking genius lmfao



Youtube channel.


Parody about masturbation.

better song about masturbation.

Where you can financially support me if you so desire (please share all of these links).