Tag Archives: Pizza

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Vex not Thou the Poet's Mind

I know you need me
To take you out of the cold
If you’d be useful and not waste.
Some really do freeze too long, you know?

Besides, I molded you with oil and flour
Long before you were even worth something.
So do as I say, not as I do-

Let me flatten you in metal,
Spread you in my personal pan,
Adorn you in the way the customer wants.
It’s always about the customer.
More toppings means more specialty.

For a time, you may be stored,
Wondering when it’ll happen,
When your day will come,
When you’ll finally be worth something.
Never fear;
I’ll call your name in due time,
When surely someone says your name,
And I’ll set you through fiery trials.

Heat makes a man and a woman,
Though sometimes you are impatient
When you wish you’ d be more content.
It’s all about the…

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My theory about salad dressing.

How do you think dressings started getting added to salads?

Here’s my theory:

Some redneck was like “I don’t want to eat no goddamn salad”, so he put mayonnaise and cheese on it to “make it more like a hamburger”.

Then, the people who considered themselves to have “culture” (the “salad-eaters”) said “Well, if you’re going to put mayonnaise on it, we’re at least going to make it look decent.”

And voila:

Salad dressing.

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